April 16, 2009
@ 11:44
简单爱(simple love)
bf asked me if that was possible for us.
and i said NO.
do you think it's possible?
being a couple who wants to live for the future,
(NO..BEING A GIRL....)
i constantly tell myself that im not going to ruin my results again,
when people around me give themselves some time for themselves..
while i stun and 发呆(stare at the blank) thinking..
what am i supposed to do?
what should u be doing??
can i go rest awhile??
or should i just rest??
WAHHHHH..
it's damn tiring can??
and also,i want him to earn more money.
because if we really EVER REALLY get married....
$1k is not enough.
well,that's one thing about having boyfriend at a working age,
and yourself being a girl who's never satisfied.
so how can i feel simple about love??
i guess it's simply NEVER.
love,isnt at all simple to me.
they always say "it's the feelings that matters".
YES,but that's only if everything else is up to standard!
if you marry a pauper with only a $500/mth,
and pathetically enough you have 3 KIDS!!!
HOW ON EARTH ARE YOU GOING TO SURVIVE..
if you were too busily in love and did not get good results..
WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE TO??
well,i'm not going to wait till that time,
to ask myself that question.
so you see..
love,at all,is not simple in my "world".
you need to be caring and somewhat gentle to the male..
(i don't like that part cuz it felt like they're the dominator..when it's supposed to be EQUAL)
and usually,the guys would be the breadwinner,
be it the woman earns OR NOT!!
(it's not fair that the guy slacks just because the woman earns rite?)
and that's just how my bf thinks..
and being a student,it's not that much when you date with another student,rite?
because rite now,they're still studying and they still have the CHANCE to make sure they DONT FLUNK.
unlike my bf,he's already in the working society,
and he cant return to the studying side because he's illiterate.
so he has to get a higher pay job even if it means to be a driver all his life!
so love in my world my dear..
is not simple at all.
take caring and gentle for example.
being such a dominator with a stubborn mindset,
i don't think he deserves to be the dominator..
because he doesn't know how to think..
and im being patient enough to not yell at him all the time..
so why should i be gentle then?
arghh..
but one thing i wont deny is that he's patient too.
much more patient..
he never yells at me,never beats me,
never stops giving in to me..
but he doesn't know how to think la..
as in..
long term type..
so...
crap..
i dowana continue liao..
just...
don't think love can ever be simple..
not to me..
is it simple to you??