June 18, 2009
@ 22:51
this is my 396th post..
i finally broke down just now..
abt an hr ago..
was listening to one of 李圣杰's song..
and jerry was on the phone with me..
i sang..
i cried..
and he cried..
hahz..
human beings seemed so fucking stubborn..
and just so fragile sometimes..
saw a familiar address on my "who viewed you" list..
wonder why he read..
but i cant read his..
what's on your mind leh..?
is it.."hah!finally she's feeling what i felt!"
or.."hope she's ok.."
or both?
i'm not even sure if he would tell me..
i hope i'll be able to stay single for the time being..
though once in awhile,like today..
i may wake up late or something..
but didn't really regret cuz i had a great dream..
a guy..stroking the back of my head so gently..
and smiling as he looks at me sleep..
i felt so happy,contented and touched..
but he's not even within my reach..
anyway,enough of emotions..
i had UT on wed which is like..ytd??
and i was so screwed lor...
oh wait!!
i mentioned le..
tsk!
whatever la..
i just wana talk to him now..
hoping i'll at least get a chance to know what kinda person he really is..
whether he's just another bastard toying with my feelings..
or is he for real..
cuz to me,he's just too good to be true..
but now just because he is not updated..
he's avoiding me..
i did not break up because of him..
i broke up because jerry himself..
haiz..
it's just that he's not ready for a future with me ba..
if in future,he changed..
hahx...
we'll see when it's time..
so..
ah..
haiz..
sleep early ba..
these emotions and tears have been driving me nuts..
and attracting headaches to me like an invisible pain magnet within my brain..
wonder who the hell put that in..
and when..
nites people..
sweet dreams..
have some fantasy..
while the day's dark..
=]