July 19, 2009
@ 11:50
“瑗珊，你今晚有在家吃吗？”
above is the most touching phrase i've heard,
coming from the people in the house.
i feel absolutely sad right now.
this is what has been happening..
[saturday,1pm to 4pm]
dressed up and had make up,
cuz i wana go shopping and happy happy today!!
went to ktv with Eve,Raymond & Jerry.
sang for 2hrs,then going to Lala Land for lunch and shopping,
but smthg happened.
i called up my mum so as to ask her,
out of courtesy but she backed her word!
if jerry's parents are going,
or if there were another 2 more friends going besides you 2,
then i'll agree.
Queen of the universe lai de lor..
cannot.yuanshan,you very capable now hor?
anything happen,think people will cover up for you,
then can don't tell me right?
my mum found out about the car accident.
jerry,i'll give you 2 hours to get your parents to my house!!
if you don't,i'll call up the police and report kidnap!!
smart??
but how??
the phone was handed to my aunty.
remember the one who caught me threatening my maid,
when i was on the way to skol when i was 6 years old??
and she grabbed me from behind in a car,
and the driver drove us home??
and after which she scotch-taped my hands and legs,
and caned me everywhere,then sent me to school??
and do you remember the woman who was my dad's old flame?
who was there on the car accident day,
and she was the one using my dad's car..
in exchange for debt-repaying??
the same woman whom my dad left for??
the same woman whom my dad wacked my mum,
because he wanted money from my mum,
so that he can go feed that woman,
but my mum didn't have money either??
my father knew my mother found out.
don't know how they sorted things,
but father sent msgs of abandonment instead.
don't want to bother why they keep dwelling in the past.
only boyfriend girlfriends then can go out together meh??
those times when i kept going out with sarah,
suggest that we're lesbians ma??
absolute ridicule.
[saturday,4pm to 6pm]
i went home from ktv to wash up and remove make up.
left the house,walked to cwp,
hoping that i would not be grabbed back home again..
while i was on the train,mother called.
she said my line,82220375 has been cut off.
asked me where am i,
am i going to go home now,
where am i going..
honestly,i didn't know..
i just wana be somewhere quiet..
i don't care about the phones..
i'll smash the piano if he doesn't want me to learn anymore..
i'll quit skol if he's so reluctant to support my studies..
[saturday,6pm to 1am]
i went to lakeside to meet jerry.
wanted to go west coast,
just stay there till i feel like going home..
but isabel called back arnd 5pm+..
i might be meeting her at marina or smthg..
i don't know..
i was very hungry..
so i went to the nearest kopitiam to eat..
then i went to jerry's house for toilet..
i sat in fron't of his computer table after that,
just trying to cool down and plan my backups..
my mum said my dad wants to change the lock,
and he wants me out of the house.
what more can i say??
no pocket money,no school,
no piano,no home??
home has never been a refuge place for me..
never....
met isabel to go donald's house at abt 10pm,
then had lil bit of steamboat..
the food was nice..
just that my heart and brain was too busy..
to even tell my tongue what the taste is..
chat a lil after eating,
then went home...
father was slping,so was everyone else..
so i bathe and slept too..
i'm sorry guys..
for worrying you,
for troubling you..
maybe things might end their way,
or just be like this i don't know yet..
till now,mother is still being sarcastic,
father is still not talking to me.
i don't know what's up next.
i'm just stuck at home without pocket money,
having stolen $10 from his pocket,
just ate some magii cooked by monkey,
and probably..not going skol tml..